All posts by PossCoach

Trusting Life Again!

You may have heard the phrase ‘trust the process of life.’ To trust Life requires most of us to re-think, review and respond differently to life’s situations, experiences and events in a very different way than we are accustomed to. This new approach may appear and feel radical or even contrary to the ways we typically handle the day to day activities of being human.

Trust Life
Trusting Life Again
The challenge most people face is they are taught and conditioned to react to life rather than ‘going with the flow.’ We react mostly out of fear, based on survival strategies wired into our minds.

From an internal mindset of fear, we experience life situations that confirm the belief that we should not trust most people and most circumstances. When we do not trust, we also eliminate taking risks.

Trusting life requires risk. Without some degree of risk, we miss out on life’s ultimate meaning which is to feel joy and exhilaration.

Our life takes on a dimension of different results and experiences when we become aware that we possess the power to change our life through the willingness to trust again.

Unfortunately, the fear of trust, which is rooted in the desire to survive, extends beyond our basic instincts and invades our minds. We then, at a very early age, begin to view each moment with a tactical survival approach. The most menial experiences and events are viewed as ‘life-threatening.’ With this belief, we learn not to trust Life. Under the umbrella of ‘Life’ falls the day to day activities that move us forward through what is intended to be a glorious journey for each of us.

It is that glorious journey, that we, by virtue of our existence, are entitled to experience. In order to experience this glorious journey it is necessary for us to be willing to take certain steps.

These steps are:

1. begin to let go of a fearful, mistrusting realm of perception.

2. being more open to rethinking and reviewing how the lack of trust blocks you from enjoying life.

3. be willing to release negative emotions that create mistrust.

4. learning how to respond and move with the flow of Life rather that reacting and being at the mercy of every life situation.

This is ultimately about changing your perspective. It has been said often that ‘when you change the way you look at things (life), the things (your life) you look at change.’

To radically change the results you are getting in your life (relationships, career, health), you will want to take a different approach.

This approach is not only about mindset. It goes beyond mindset, requiring us to change at the level of emotions and feelings. To trust the process of life, we each must disengage ourselves from the dominant fearful emotions and feelings we experience daily. This is about taking our power back from the fear-based feelings that have enslaved us for far too long.

We take our power back through a process called ‘shedding the light on the darkness.’ The light represents our new perspective. The darkness is our conditioning from the past which we presently repeat, resulting in a future that looks very much like our life today.

The darkness also includes our fears and our reactivity to it. The light is love, which is a much healthier response to life and all that it presents to us daily.

When we come from light and love, and begin to awaken to the realization that ‘yes, I have the power to trust the process of life,’ our life begins to dramatically improve.

One way to immediately create positive changes in your life is to become aware that you not only are not your thoughts; you are also not the emotions and feelings attached to these thoughts. This one realization, in and of itself, can be life changing.

By affirming your willingness to begin again and trust the process of life, miracles will happen on your behalf. It has been said that ‘miracles can move mountains.’ We’d like to add that ‘you don’t need to move mountains to experience miracles!’

To enhance the positive changes you desire for your life, we would like to give to you a gift: we call it your own personal My Declaration of Trust.’ If you like, print it, read it daily and experience a shift in your life that gets you back on what we call ‘life’s glorious journey.’

It’s never too late to begin to trust or to begin to trust again. Yesterday is history. What’s done is done! Read the Declaration of Trust, or if you like, create your own and witness the miracles one by one, day by day!

We can assist you to trust life again. Learn how here!

trust life

trust life

Tis Always the Season for Giving

As the world busily prepares for the holiday season, let us recall that this time of year symbolizes and personifies giving. Giving, as an act, and as an expression of love, kindness and generosity, is a beautiful thing.

Giving Love is the Best Gift
Giving Love is the Best Gift
In today’s fast-paced society, the act of giving; moreover, the art of giving in its’ purest form, has been lost. It has rapidly become an extinct species; a fossil buried in the sands of time.

Giving has become part of the collective neurosis. For too many, it has become an act of labor and no longer a labor of love. We have discussed with so many clients over the years about this time of year and the challenges they face with giving. Their challenges with giving are typically overshadowed by what we call ‘the 3 P’s’ during the holiday season: procrastination, perfectionism and paralysis of analysis. These three mind/body control devices can easily create inner havoc for those who have to decide on, find and give just the right gift.

For those of us who are put off by the shopping experience, we delay the inevitable of purchasing the perfect gift until the eleventh hour when all hell breaks loose. For those of us who have convinced ourselves that we have to find the perfect gift for that special someone or our hard to please in-law, the anxiety of finding a gift can drive us to contracting SAMM (seasonal anxiety manufacturing madness). Actually, we just made that disorder up, although, who knows, it may be real for you!

For others, the holiday season may be a time of withdraw and hibernation. A time to be out-of sight and free from the pressures that this season can exude if we succumb to the tidal wave of commercialism, consumerism and materialism.

Beyond all this frantic doing, buried in the sands of time, yet always available to us, is the act and art of giving.

Now, more than ever before, we want to include giving, in its’ purest form, back into our lives, both individually and collectively.

Let us ask you two questions:

Do you know what giving really is?
What does giving mean to you?

These two questions, when answered honestly, will tell you whether or not you truly understand what giving is and whether or not your version is pure or distorted. Don’t despair or ruminate about your answers. We will give you the solutions.

Giving is an act. An act of conveyance, sharing, inclusion and recognition. It is also an art. An art that is innate and alive within each of us on the visceral and spiritual levels.

Giving, in its’ purest form, comes from an open and loving heart. It has no agendas, no expectations. Giving, in its’ impure and polluted version, is likened to a business contract: giving in the name of getting something in return.

During the holiday season, or during any time of year for that matter, we can always give ‘things;’ yet, not give in the purest sense at all.

The art of giving is a sharing of a gift. A spiritual gift. Like any spiritual gift, giving is an expression of love, kindness and generosity.

Giving, therefore, is not really anything you can purchase; it is something you already have and decide to share.

When we begin to understand the true meaning and importance of the act and art of giving, we begin to effectively change lives; ours and those in our circle of influence.

Let us for the moment, set aside the idea of giving as it relates to the tradition of exchanging material items. Let’s view it from a purely spiritual perspective.

There is in spiritual law an absolute truth that says, ‘I cannot give what I do not have.’ There is another truth that states, ‘All that I give is given to myself.’

What do these laws mean and how can we apply them to the holiday season and beyond?

First, ‘I cannot give what I do not have.’ No, this is not referring to money. It does, however, refer to a loving disposition and open heart. In this season, or any season, if you do not come from a place in your heart that reflects pure, positive, unconditional love, then you really do not have a whole lot to give. Love, or what we think it is, becomes a pale imitation of the real thing.

For this holiday season, then, commit to giving more from the heart and less from the anxiety-ridden mind and the wallet. Giving your most loving self to someone is the best gift you could ever give, and it’s easy on the spending budget.

The second law, ‘All that I give is given to myself,’ simply means that what we give to the world is returned to us today, tomorrow, or at some future date to be determined by the Universe. This is known as ‘karma.’

To live by this law requires us to become consciously aware of what it is we are giving to the world.

Know that what you give to others is returned to you. With that in mind, decide to give to others the gifts you want to receive yourself. Ask yourself, ‘What is it that I want most in and for my life?’ Your answer probably isn’t a thing. More than likely, it is a feeling. A feeling that makes you feel good. We can call this feeling anything we want; yet at the end of the day what we all want are the gifts of unconditional love and inner peace.

To give love and peace to others requires us to first be open to receiving love and peace ourselves. This season, commit to becoming more loving and more peaceful. These are selfless acts that you do for yourself so you can share it with others.

Love and inner peace are the most memorable and powerful gifts we can give any time of the year. All other gifts, wrapped nicely and adorned with ribbons and bows, become secondary and are soon forgotten.

When we give love and are at peace, we miraculously experience and receive the same in return. You see friends, giving and receiving are simply two aspects of the same thing.

Authentic giving and receiving know no boundaries and limits. Spiritual law tells us that life and all of its’ infinite possibilities (including love and inner peace), are available to us for the asking.

So, ask! Ask and it is given. Give love! Be at peace! Be the best gift for others and yourself this holiday season and beyond. And yes, you can put a bow on your head and even wrap yourself in ribbon.

Our gift to you is: 8 Tips to Create More Success, Inner Peace and Happiness in Your Life! Download it here.

Peace to you and yours!

giving

giving

Is Technology Replacing Love?

Recently, we saw a post on Facebook that said social media is destroying relationships. In response, someone disagreed and said that social media is bringing us closer to everyone in the world.

Do you love technology too much?
Do you love technology too much?
It may be true that the internet has allowed us to create a smaller world and to come together and communicate on a global scale with ease. At what price though?

The other day we passed by a local eatery that we frequent on occasion. There was a line of traffic on the road in front of us so we were stopped directly across from the restaurant’s entrance.

It was a Saturday and very busy. People were waiting outside to have their names called when a table was available. To our astonishment, each one of the dozen or so people who was standing there had a hand-held device and was totally engrossed in whatever they were reading or searching for. They were all standing together and yet no one was talking to each other! Everyone was looking down at their devices. These very same people who send emails, texts and Facebook posts communicate freely on their devices, however, when they are standing right next to one another, they don’t know what to say!

This is just one of countless incidents that we have witnessed where people in public, who are undoubtedly with family or friends in supposed social situations, have literally ‘checked-out’ from where they are physically.

A while back we wrote about this same subject and how technology is adversely affecting parent/child relationships. The effect is the same no matter who is involved and the questions we must ask are ‘Is technology a substitute for love?’ and ‘Is technology destroying our capacity to genuinely connect with each other?’

Social media and gadgets have their place and do serve a positive purpose. However, they also appeal to and enhance dysfunctional behavior by a world population that is increasingly voyeuristic and at the same time increasingly isolated from real physical, personal relationships and social interaction.

Yes, the world is smaller because of technology. It is also becoming a haven for people, who in their lifetime, will experience little, if any, healthy relationships, real communication and genuine intimacy.

If you’re a baby-boomer like we are, then you may recall a movie in the 1970s called ‘Sleeper.’ It was written, directed and starred Woody Allen. In it, Allen is transported to a futuristic society where he discovers many oddities. Among them is a machine called an Orgasmitron. This machine allows you to have a sexual encounter without even having a physical partner.

We know what you’re thinking, so let’s keep it ‘clean!’ The point is, how far-fetched is the idea of having technology replacing love? Will the genuine human need, desire and drive for interpersonal interaction become obsolete?

As Relationship Coaches, we have heard stories from clients about marriages ending and breakups occurring through text-messaging. We’ve been told by clients about being terminated from their job via email by a boss who was in the same room at the time.

To us, this is indicative of a society that is particularly out-of-touch with its’ emotions and its’ ability to have truly mature relationships.

Now, more than ever, it is so important to be willing to participate in the world of face-to-face interaction. If you believe that technology is going to fulfill your every want, need and desire then you are deluding yourself and will end up very disappointed.

Perhaps in this moment you are struggling with a particular relationship. Or maybe, you feel like you lack the communication skills to express your true feelings. It may also be possible that you are using technology as an escape from a not so pleasant life situation.
You may also be using social media as a way to get attention; which is another way of saying ‘to feel love and approval.’

No matter what roles technology, the internet and social media play in your life, there is a very strong probability that you are over-indulging for a variety of emotionally unhealthy reasons.

Here are some tips that may assist you to use technology less and in healthier ways:

1. If technology usage is work or career-related then keep it focused on the task or project at hand.
Set parameters for yourself when you will and will not use technology. For example, we consciously keep all technology off for 24 hours on Sundays and we don’t miss it!

2. Turn technology off when you are in the company of others, especially loved ones. Learn how to give more attention to the people you love than some inanimate hand-held device.

3.Power down technology at least one hour before bedtime. Instead, read a book, listen to music, have a conversation with your spouse or better yet, just have sex!

From our perspective there is good news. Technology cannot and will not replace our desires to experience authentic human contact and love.

Yes, technology has brought us closer globally and that’s great! It has also given us a real sense of who and where we are as a society and has shed the spotlight on a real social problem: that most people live in avoidance of and isolation from emotional interaction.

Technology is hitting us all in the face by demonstrating that what we want most of all (to love and be loved) is what we fear the most.

No machine can ever give you what you or another person can give you. Take the time to honestly look at your relationship with technology. Is technology a substitute for love in your life?

To learn more about us and to receive guidance about love, marriage, divorce and how to create healthier, happier relationships in your life, connect with us here.

technology

technology

The Spiritual Side of Divorce

Divorce in America is at an all time high. The rate of divorce for second marriages is even higher than the rate for first marriages. Over the last 3 years, the demographics of clients in our relationship coaching practice represented a divorce rate of over 80%. So what’s going on in our world where relationships have become as disposable as plastic water bottles?

Spiritual Divorce
Spiritual Divorce
One way people can respond to this epidemic is to say that the moral fiber of our society is crumbling and crashing. Or that commitment to long-term relationships and the stability they are intended to provide for each of us is rapidly becoming an out-dated institution? Perhaps you personally may believe this explanation is valid. Or perhaps it isn’t.

Is the alarming divorce rate is a symptom of a society that has a deficiency? A deficiency of unworthiness that causes us to fear intimacy, openness, giving and receiving, sharing and love. As relationship coaches, we have found this to be the case with many of our clients who are facing rocky marriages and divorce.

From our vantage point we see the high rate of divorce as a symptom of a society that has become increasingly fragmented, isolated, fearful and expendable and sees relationships only as a means to a personal end.

However, we also see divorce as an opportunity to specifically heal the emotional wounds that marital relationships represent to both parties.

To heal an emotional wound is spiritual. Any lasting workable solution to any relationship problem is spiritual in nature. There is no alternative. If you believe that a big, fat alimony check is going to make everything all better, think again!

The problem was never about the divorce or how your spouse never lived up to his or her side of the bargain to honor and obey, in sickness and in health, for richer or poorer.

The real problem, which is always an opportunity for spiritual growth and healing, is that you bring to your relationships (marital and otherwise), your wounds from your past. Until you heal those wounds, you will repeat them.

The spiritual side of divorce, is like any life challenge, a potential blessing in disguise. It is an opportunity to look at yourself head-on in the mirror and say to yourself, ‘What is this situation showing me about myself and what is it attempting to teach me?’ Ask for an answer. Ask for guidance. You will hear it!

The spiritual side of divorce can open the door for you to finally grow-up and truly become the mature adult who can readily participate in healthy mature relationships.

When we say ‘mature’ we are not referring to the day-to-day activities and responsibilities of the average adult like having a job, paying the bills, putting a roof over your family’s head and food on the table.

We are referring to a maturity that goes much deeper than that. A maturity that has less to do with who you are and what you do and more about your willingness to heal where you are emotionally wounded. This is what it means to be spiritually mature.

Spiritual maturity is about learning how to take responsibility for your life. Responsibility for your life situations, experiences and relationships as well as the state of your emotions.

The spiritual side of divorce represents an opening. An opening where perhaps just a sliver of light is shining on a situation that looks very dark. It is only through your willingness that more light can shine on you and your life.

It is only when we begin to heal from within that the physical reality of our life and relationships permanently improve and change.

If you are experiencing intimate relationship challenges, consider the following tips as guidelines that may assist you to begin to see you and your life from a new, healthier perspective:

1. Stop playing the victim! Playing the victim role always attracts a cast of characters who are more than willing to perpetrate emotional pain on to a willing victim.

2. Cease blaming others for your situation. Until you take full and complete responsibility for your life and the role you play in it, you will suffer at the emotional mercy of other people.

3. Be open to looking within and discover why your life is not the romance novel you hoped it could have been.

4. Become more open to changing by developing a more positive, optimistic attitude and notice how you are attracting more positive, optimistic people in to your life.

5. Begin the process of loving and respecting yourself more. If you don’t love and respect yourself, how can you expect anyone else to love and respect you?

Whether you are going through a divorce now, contemplating one, have experienced one, and are attempting to get your life back on track, know that now is the time to heal your wounded relationship. First by beginning to heal the relationship with your spouse or your ex. Second, and more significant, is healing the relationship with yourself.

As relationship and divorce coaches we believe that ‘relationships are the cornerstone for all existence.’

The spiritual side of divorce is a divine invitation from your soul to heal your emotional wounds from all of your current and past relationships.

If you are contemplating divorce, going through divorce or rebuilding your life after divorce, we can assist you! Learn more.

©Possibility Coaches LLC

spiritual divorce

spiritual divorce

3 Keys to Healthy Relationships

We all want healthy relationships! So why don’t we have healthy relationships? To experience healthy relationships, it’s important to understand that the physical world we see is like a gigantic mirror. It always reflects back to us our dominant thoughts, beliefs, feelings and emotions. What we see is a result of what we project. Our world is the screen. On that screen is a movie. We each script it, produce it, direct it and even act in it.

Tips for a Healthy Relationship
Tips for Healthy Relationships
If you are unhappy with ‘the plot’ and the cast of characters in your life, then perhaps it is time for a re-write of your script. The quickest, most efficient way to change the world you see is to begin to be more open, willing and vulnerable to healing your life through the relationships you may consider unhealthy or unstable.

Here are three key ways that the healing power of your relationships can assist you to create a new life for yourself.

Tip #1: Be open and willing to stop trying to ‘fix’ and ‘save’ other people. If you are in the habit of trying to fix and save people be open and willing to give this up now! Do not expect anyone else to change because you want them to. If you are carrying a ‘I’ll be happy and at peace when (s)he changes’ belief, you are going to wait a very long time…even a lifetime, for that to happen.

Wanting someone to change for self-gratification is an emotionally exhausting process. It creates stress and frustration, as well as physical disease. It is really about a need to control. Ultimately, the desire for someone else to change so we can be happy interferes with our Life learning process. In the end no one gains the wisdom required to be truly happy. This wisdom is programmed in to each relationship that affects our well-being.

Instead of wanting other people to change for you, focus on YOU and how you can make an uplifting contribution to all of your relationships. Start by blessing all of your relationships, past and present, good or bad. When you do this you instantly have a more positive impact on the world.

While going through this new process, you may also uncover some aspects of yourself that you may not like very much. Be okay with who you are! There is always room for change. Creating change from within is a conscious choice that we each can make if we want to improve the quality of all of our relationships.

Tip #2: Get to know yourself now! If you truly desire more intimacy in your personal relationships begin by focusing on developing an intimate relationship with yourself. The truth is, if you are challenged being intimate with you, how can you expect to be intimate with someone else?

Get to know “you” by going on a date with yourself. Spend alone time. Journal your thoughts about what you love about you. Begin to enjoy your own company!

To improve all of your relationships begins at home, with each of us contributing our share for positive change. Gandhi said, ‘Be the change you want to see.’ This is especially relevant when it comes to the state of our relationships. To improve and awaken to the power of our relationships requires each of us to lead by example. Strong, healthy relationships are the result of giving our focused attention to our feelings, emotions and energy levels directly linked to the relationships themselves.

To improve our life and our world requires us to consciously aim to put our heart and soul in to each and every relationship, because your relationships always reflect the heart and soul of who you think you are and who you potentially can become.

All relationships are the building blocks of life; however, they are often forfeited or destroyed in the name of personal needs or gratification and even for what some may call ‘success.’

Tip #3: Begin to develop more self-confidence and healthier self-esteem. You achieve this by learning to let go of the past and cease worrying about the future. Be alive now. Accept that you are unique and one-of-a kind and so is everyone else. Experiencing healthy relationships is also about realizing that we are all interconnected to everyone and everything.

To experience this idea of uniqueness and interconnectedness simply requires a shift in how you look at things. Recall that your life and world is the movie you created. You can edit and re-write the storyline as you choose.

We are each the small successes on the big stage called Earth. Small successes, compounded over time, can create some awesome results. To achieve results requires commitment, fortitude, courage and a willingness to play the Game of Life.

The Game of Life cannot be played out to its full beauty and grandeur without your consent. All, truly healthy, mature relationships, must contain consenting adults. From this point forward, consent to take responsibility for your life by strengthening all of your relationships.

Have you ever considered Relationship Coaching? It’s great if you are single and looking, in a relationship or just ended one. See what it can do for you.

©Possibility Coaches, LLC

healthy relationships

healthy relationships

How to Widen Your Circle of Compassion

How do you widen your circle of compassion? It has been a dream of ours to assist in the creation of a world where it is completely safe for all of us to love each other. A world where we can be loved and accepted exactly as we are. This world we envision can and does exist now. This world we envision exists in each of our minds. To transmute it into physical reality requires us to embrace the power of viewing the world through the eyes of compassion.

Author and spiritual teacher Pema Chodron suggests to us that

“compassion is not a relationship between the healer and the wounded. It’s a relationship between equals. Only when we know our own darkness can we be present with the darkness of others. Compassion becomes real when we recognize our shared humanity.”

Compassion
Compassion
What is the darkness and where does it come from? Look at our history both collectively and personally and we have the answer. Personally, as children, we were socialized and conditioned in so many ways. By the time we reached puberty life became scary and daunting. By this time we pretty well established our own personal viewpoints and ‘takes’ on the world. We were educated and indoctrinated into the world of fear and separation.

A fear of compassion arises because, like so many heart-felt emotions (love, courage, empathy), it creates a feeling of vulnerability.

Vulnerability in our world is a sign of weakness, and anything that is said to weaken us is, to our conditioned, fear-based minds, something to be suspicious of at best.

Many think that having compassion ‘rights a wrong.’ Others may believe that compassion negates a valuable lesson to be learned and justice that needs to be served. And then there are those who may see compassion as a ‘liberal’ approach to those who may be looking for a ‘free ride’ through the journey we call Life.

Compassion is about unity and oneness. Compassion can enable us to heal by removing the socialization and conditioning we succumbed to as innocent children. The power of compassion has been grossly under-used, misunderstood and even ignored in our world for far too long. Compassion is powerful, yet benign. It can move mountains, yet simultaneously heal all wounds. Compassion is an expression of unconditional love and unconditional love is God.

To perceive compassion as dis-empowering is a misinterpretation of what compassion truly is at its’ essence. Einstein wrote:

“a human being is a part of the whole called by us Universe, a part limited in time and space. He experiences himself, his thoughts and feelings as something separated from the rest, a kind of optical delusion of his consciousness. This delusion is a prison for us, restricting us to our personal desires. Our task must be to free ourselves from this prison by widening our circle of compassion to embrace all living creatures and the whole of nature and its beauty.”

So, how do we, as Einstein suggests, widen our circle of compassion? First, we have to be open and willing to create our own circle. Then to widen our circle, to expand our very own compassionate nature and share it with humanity, requires each of us to dissect, peel away and let go of what Einstein called our own ‘optical delusion.’ The result is an unveiling of our essential, true, changeless, eternal nature. By virtue of its connection to God, our true nature only knows compassion. There is no figuring out what compassion is and what it looks and sounds like. We need only to create awareness what compassion is not.

Compassion IS NOT fear. Compassion IS NOT separation and exclusion. Compassion IS NOT lack and unworthiness. Compassion IS NOT brute-force, control and manipulation. Compassion IS NOT greed. Compassion IS NOT hatred.

When we eliminate what compassion is not from our personal selves and subsequently the world-at-large, compassion itself unfolds, breathes, expands and embraces itself within and between each and every life form that exists.

Compassion is an aspect of unconditional love. All the great sages past and present know this and speak about it. All of them were and are the very embodiment of a compassionate nature.

We are all sages. We all possess a compassionate nature. The intent for all of us is to incorporate this nature into our daily lives. This one intention: to be compassionate toward all of life (and this includes ourselves) is the key to thriving on Planet Earth.

Here are some ways you can begin to incorporate the power of compassion and widen its circle in your life:

1.See all of Life as another aspect of yourself. Treat all Life as you want to be treated: with love, kindness and compassion.

2.Let go of personal past hurts and wounds by having compassion for events, experiences and relationships that had less than positive outcomes.

3.Know that we are all living the same life story. It’s just the names, faces, locations and events that appear different. Our stories are part of our journey. They are the Universe giving us ‘feedback.’ By using the feedback wisely you can change your story. See others who are suffering with compassion. They suffer because they are not aware that they have the power to change their story.

4.Give up the notions of striving, achieving and being the best. Your true nature only knows how to thrive and always sees itself as pure perfection. Look within and see your true nature.

5.Practice kindness and give without conditions. Develop a consciousness of oneness. Notice how we are truly ‘all one playing off each other.’

The Dalai Lama put it beautifully when he said,

“If you want others to be happy, practice compassion. If you want to be happy, practice compassion.”

Now, more than ever, the world as a living, breathing organism needs your compassion. God wants you to be happy! God wants you to thrive! Compassion is a path and our wish is that you walk upon it.

Do you want to learn how to create more compassion for others and for yourself? How about adding some sense of balance to your life too? Learn how to create more compassion and balance with The Blueprint for Living Online Program.

compassion

compassion

In God We Trust

In God We Trust. These are the words inscribed on American currency. Our forefathers knew something special, spiritual and perhaps mystical when they adopted these words. Have we forgotten what they knew? Have we decided to live our lives by standards that lack trust in God and in any creative power including ourselves?

In God We Trust
In God We Trust
I believe we, as a people, have turned our backs on God. When I speak of and write the word ‘God’ I specifically am referring to the Power that is in all including you and me. If you know, as I do, that God lives in each of us, then the question to ask is “If we don’t trust God, are we simply not trusting ourselves?”

I believe that this one question defines in totality for us all, the purpose of our human experience. Yes, to trust God is to trust our Self. Trust, which is an aspect of faith, is also found in the power of unconditional love. Therefore, to trust ourselves means to have faith in our Godliness, which is the power of unconditional love.

For decades I grappled with God. As a teen, I felt God ‘lost my file.’ He had somehow forgotten me. I felt lost among the masses of the billions of others he had forsaken, too.

Later, I doubted his existence. After that I got really pissed off at him. I tried every which way to turn my life into the way I thought it ‘should be.’
Then, one day, I realized that I had exhausted every plan to control my world and have it be the way I wanted it to be. The result, however, was always a no-win situation. There was no one or no thing that could give me what I wanted more than anything else. You see, the realization for me, which was my awakening, was that all I ever wanted was the Peace of God.

When I ran out of ‘human options’ I turned my life over to Him/Her. Put another way, I turned my life over to that part of me that is changeless and eternal. That part of me that knows no fear, no disease and no death.

All I did was to make the decision FOR God. I will share with you that when I did this, it became extremely liberating emotionally, mentally and physically.

From that moment my life became simplified. My life flowed with ease. I had two goals from that point forward: to experience the Peace of God and to be of service to the world in some capacity.

No more doubt! No more drama! No more strategic planning! I gave my spiritual Self permission to run the show called ‘My Life.’ My human, socially conditioned, follow –the-herd little self, now has only one function: to navigate, to be the vehicle, the body, that transports the ‘In God I Trust’ me from one moment to the next.

So how did I move from turning my back on God to allowing the Power that is God use me as a vessel? I really didn’t ‘do’ anything. Looking back it was my willingness to let go of a long list of fear-based attributes, beliefs and behaviors that caused me to suffer and return home to who I and you truly are at our core.

Here’s the ‘short list’ of what it was that I let go of. Imagine we are like onions and each layer is an aspect of fear we want to remove and discard. Removing and discarding fear. For me, and perhaps you, too, it was fear of:
1. Trusting God
2. Loving myself and my life
3. Loving other people
4. Letting the world see the true me
5. Feeling joy (which is feeling the God Power)
6. Living in the mystery
7. My greatness

Look at my list. Read my list over and over about what I was fearful of for way too long. What a paradox! That which I feared most, was really what I was seeking all along!

Trusting God. Loving myself and my life unconditionally. Loving other people unconditionally. Being authentic. Feeling joy. Living in the mystery. Acknowledging my greatness. It’s a process. Be patient. Have faith. This works!

To live by the words ‘In God We Trust’ requires each of us to make the decision ‘In God I Trust.’

My wish for you is that you make the decision I did and live by these words! If you haven’t done so already, I trust you will! Peace!

Chris and I are offering you a gift. It’s a free download of our Special Report:Breaking The Chain of Pain -Freeing Yourself From The Negativity of Your Past! This is our way of saying thank you for visiting our blog!

God

God

Bullying: 7 Ways to End it Now!

Bullying gets so much press these days. That’s a good thing! To shine the light on the darker aspects of our human experience like bullying helps us to create positive shifts both individually and collectively.

Bullying: 7 Ways to End it Now!
How to Stop Bullying!
Bullying is an esteem issue. Bullying is about being convinced that ‘for me to feel good, I must make you feel bad.’ Bullying isn’t only inflicted through physical abuse and violence. There are more subtle, less obvious versions of bullying like verbal abuse, mind control, manipulation and distortion of the truth. Bullies always target someone who, like them, doesn’t have healthy self-esteem.

So, why do people become bullies?
As I said, bullying is a symptom of low self-esteem created by one or all of the following life challenges: 1. lack of trust in role models like parents, 2. the need to be in control because life feels out-of-control, 3. the need for attention, approval and love, 4. deep anger issues, 5. always feeling ‘wrong,’ 6. being bullied physically and/or verbally themselves and 7. being emotionally abandoned as a child.

Bullying requires two parties, each of whom does not feel good about him or herself. It’s not only in the school yard. In fact, it’s likely to start in the home between husbands and wives, parents and children and between siblings.

The dysfunctional behavior that bullying represents is the result of most challenges people face world-wide in today’s societies.

When we each have a healthy sense of ourselves…in other words, a healthy self-esteem, most of life’s so-called ‘problems’ seemingly disappear.

No matter where you are in life: young/old, male/female, and no matter what roles you play: husband/wife, parent/child, boss/employee, friend, classmate, the most important step is to feel good about yourself. When you and I take responsibility for feeling good about ourselves and share with others how to feel good, too, bullying will become a behavior of the past.

Chris and I have developed what we feel are 7 approaches that can assist you to begin to eliminate being bullied or the role of being a bully from your life and the lives of those you cherish and love.

7 Ways to End Bullying Now!:

1. Become aware about how you feel about yourself. Be honest! Not feeling good about yourself is just based on a negative story you’ve been telling yourself over and over. Is the story absolutely true about you? I doubt it!

2. Identify your fears. This pertains to both you the bully and you the victim. For example: perhaps as a child, your parents divorced. You couldn’t control that, so to create a level of safety and security, you unconsciously decided to bully others because it gave you a sense of control, power and security.

3. Create small ‘successes’ in your life that will make you feel more confident thus building your self-esteem. This is essential not only for children, but for adults, too! And especially for you adults reading this blog who have children: assist your children by supporting their likes and passions. Let them explore life on their own terms. Otherwise, you’re bullying.

4. Choose to be around positive people. Hang out with people who lift you up and don’t put you down. Examine your circle of friends. The company you keep is very telling about how you feel about yourself.

5. Mentor or coach with someone who can assist you to go through the process of raising your self-esteem.

6. Have the courage to set boundaries. Bullying is all about ignoring boundaries and disrespecting others. Know that real boundaries between you and others can only exist when there is mutual respect.

7. Celebrate your uniqueness and the uniqueness of those you love. People who tend to be bullied are perceived to be different in some way. They may be quiet, shy, non-athletic or non-academic. It’s important to understand that it’s part of who they are.

By committing to these seven suggestions, you can begin to develop a healthy self-esteem and assist others to do the same. It doesn’t matter your role, be it the bully, the bullied or even both. When we feel good about ourselves, bullying will dissipate and perhaps diminish in our world as we know it.

You and I both have the power within us to change. It is that power to feel good about ourselves that will end bullying. We can do it!

bullying

bullying

bullying

Goals Made Easy

Goals. Having them and getting them. We are all so conditioned to believe that having goals and getting them are essentials to our happiness and success.

Goals Made Easy
Goals Made Easy
For nearly 40 years, I had this belief. Over the last ten years however, I have learned that having goals and goal setting are not necessarily prerequisites for happiness or success. In fact, I have come to the conclusion that for most people the idea of having a long list of goals and achieving them is a prescription for disaster. This prescription is laced with anxiety, worry, chaos, procrastination and stress. And the end result is one that is lackluster, filled with disappointment, discouragement and despondency.

From personal experience, I have also learned that in order to achieve the results that we each want for our life, we first and foremost do absolutely nothing. Yes, you read correctly! Here’s why…

Have you ever written down a list of goals you wanted to achieve? I have and I must say it was usually a complete waste of time and emotional energy. Why? Because at the time when I wrote them, I did not feel worthy of receiving these goals, nor did I believe that I could realistically achieve them. In other words, when we set goals that are not in alignment with our personal belief systems, the likelihood of getting the results we want is relatively low at best.

Obtaining the results we want, are much more readily achieved when our mindset is in alignment with those goals. This requires creating a new belief system. One that projects to the world a sense of worthiness, wholeness and self-respect.

For example, feeling happy and successful is far more beneficial than setting goals. Especially if we are convinced that these goals will make us happier and more successful. You see, most of us live life backwards. I call it the ‘I’ll be happy and successful when’ Syndrome.

This leads to another reason why setting goals is a waste of time: they psychologically put all of the ideal situations and experiences we desire in to the future. This mind-screwing game, beyond all aspects of goal-setting, is what sets most people up for letdowns, rather than receiving the results they want. Happiness and success, as a result of this approach, are always some future destination.

Now, here’s a ‘kicker’ about goals, goal-setting and goal-getting that will make it easier for you to achieve exactly the results in your life that are the ‘best fit’ for you. It is what I call ‘goals made easy.’

‘Goals Made Easy’ is a different kind of prescription for experiencing the perfect results, for the perfect life, for the perfect person that is you.

It is not giving up the idea of goals. It is about using goals in your life from a very different perspective. It is about no longer looking at goals as an ‘end’ resulting from working hard, so we can ‘make it happen’ and be happy and successful.

What I am suggesting is that you still have goals. Only two goals specifically and using them as means, not as end results.

These two goals, to be effective, require you to give up all other goals. If you are an avid goal-setter this can be challenging and even a bit scary. In addition, these two goals can only be 100% effective if you consciously believe that the first goal is all you want to have for yourself and the second goal is what you are willing to give to the world.

The two goals that I am referring to are (1) the goal to experience inner peace and (2) the goal to be of service to the world in some shape or form with the intention to provide that service for the highest good of all concerned (and that includes you).

I guarantee that if you are open and willing to adopt these two goals; not as end results, but as means to only positive results, you automatically and spontaneously will be happy and successful.

I have found that in Life, when I am at peace and when I put service to others above all self-motivations, I receive exactly what I need so I can enjoy my life experience to its fullest.

Stop wasting time and energy setting goals that are outside of you. Understand, there is nothing wrong with ‘things.’ Money, homes, cars, clothes are neutral. Yes, I know, we need our basic needs met! However, when we place value on them as necessities for our happiness and success, we inevitably set ourselves up for misery and disappointment. Have you ever been on a hamster wheel. Do you get the picture?

Interestingly enough, I have found that truly happy and successful people are those individuals who live life from a place of inner peace and who put service to others first. They always seem to be living the life that is best suited for them. A life that meets all their wants and desires and is in alignment with who they truly are. ‘Goals Made Easy’ is created by only having two goals in every moment of every day.

Remember this: the most powerful possession you will always have is your peace! To achieve inner peace you must be willing to let go of all external goals other than being of service to the world. Your results may astound you when you live life with two goals in mind. How much easier can it get?

Do you want to create more balance in your life and learn how to master your mindset? Have more inner peace and discover your greater purpose? You can do it and you don’t need goals!

goals

goals

goals

Knowing the True Meaning of Personal Growth

Personal growth. What does it mean to you? Does it scare you? Is it a place you rather avoid or not even deal with at all? Is it some type of process or cure that will make you a better person? Is it a journey that in the end will give you happiness and fulfillment? Or perhaps, it’s a destination that when you arrive, all your desires, wants and needs will be waiting for you?

with The Possiblity Coaches
Personal Growth with The Possibility Coaches
If you, like most people, believe any of the scenarios I have just described, then you do not understand the meaning of personal growth.

The truth is, that the essence of personal growth is not personal at all. Nor does it require any growth on your part physically, mentally, emotionally or spiritually.

There is no ‘adding to’ with personal growth. There are no course requirements or educational courses. No certificates and no degrees.

The true nature of personal growth is really quite impersonal. The experience is the same for you as it is for me. No matter your background, who you are, where you come from, the titles you hold, the possessions you call ‘mine.’ All of this is irrelevant.

Personal growth is not about becoming better. It is about recognizing who you already are and letting go of everyone and everything that you identify with as being part of the person you call ‘me.’

To experience personal growth is to experience a diminishing or lessening of identifying with your past and how over a lifetime, you have been conditioned to see yourself and your world in a particular way. You can call that ‘my story.’

Personal growth is about letting go of your story. Now you will ask me, ‘Who am I without my story?’ Great question! To truly experience the essence of personal growth it is necessary to know the answer to that one single question.

Imagine yourself, if you can, living life without your story. No more sad endings. No more unhappiness. No more conflict. The end of searching for the perfect life, the perfect partner, the perfect job, house, car, etc.

Without a story, there is no past and no future. There is only now. You give up being a victim. You stop victimizing others. You live from one moment to the next as who you truly are: a spiritual being enjoying your human experience.

Spirit is our essential nature. When you understand this and I mean really ‘get it’ within every fiber of your being, you are living life authentically.

To live life authentically simply means to be real. Who you really are is not the roles you play. Personal growth is about coming to that realization. Who you are is not your name, your appearance, your possessions. The truth is personal growth begins and ends with not knowing who you are at all.

If that thought scares you or even makes you feel threatened, be okay with those feelings. It is quite natural.

Personal growth is about awakening to who you always have been and always will be. We each awaken through awareness. Through awareness we begin to understand that who we think and believe we are is part of the human condition. Over time, we became convinced that we are defined by and dependent upon all things physical: people, possessions, experiences, events and situations.

Personal growth is a diminishing of who you think you are and an arising of becoming consciously aware of your essential, changeless nature. And what is your essential, changeless nature? It is the same as my and everyone’s essential nature: unconditional love.

Now you know what personal growth is and is not. From this vantage point I would like to give you some hands-on applications to assist you to live your life through your essential, changeless nature of unconditional love.

If any of these applications challenge you, then partner with someone who can guide you through the process. This can be a close friend you feel is truly grounded and feels comfortable in their own skin. Or you can mentor with someone who has gone through the transformational experience of true personal growth.

Applications to Experience Personal Growth:

1. Question every belief you have about yourself. Write these beliefs down. Share them with someone you trust. Are these beliefs absolutely true? If they aren’t, let them go!

2. Write a new story for your life. The story you keep telling yourself is the story you keep on living through and experiencing. Do you want a different ending? Then, write a different story!

3. Give up being a victim of life. This includes letting go of being a victim of other people’s ideas, beliefs, words and behavior. Take responsibility for your own life. Focus on your ideas, your beliefs, the way you express yourself and your behavior. Focus on being a kinder, more loving person.

4. Let go of the past and the emotional pain associated with it. The only way to accomplish this is through the power of forgiveness.

5. Cease worrying about the future. You have been conditioned (as was I) to endlessly worry about tomorrow. Begin to allow the power of trust to dominate your nature. Your breathing as you read this. Trust you will be breathing tomorrow!

Personal growth is about being authentic. When you are authentic, you will feel comfortable in your own skin.

I will close by quoting one of my ‘tips’ from my book I co-authored with Chris. It reads, ‘Be authentic today! Authenticity is more than being real, honest and upfront with others. It is about being true to you. It is also about creating an outer, physical world that reflects who you are at your core…the heart and soul that is you! Do not deprive yourself any longer of the experience of being authentic. It will block you and the world around you from evolving both physically and spiritually. Free yourself and the world by practicing authenticity today!’

Once you do, I promise your life will be totally magnificent! Now you know the true meaning of personal growth!

personal growth

personal growth

personal growth

Secrets to Finding True Love!

We’re going to talk about true love, but not necessarily in a way you may think! Visualize a horse with a carrot dangling about a foot in front of it. That’s how we get the horse to move in a forward direction.

Now imagine that you are that horse (no insult intended) and the carrot represents love in all its various forms. Like the horse in pursuit of the carrot, this is how most of us pursue love. We convince ourselves that once we are given love by another person our life is complete. We believe that the emotional void will disappear and be filled by a proclamation of love from someone else.

Secrets to finding true love
Secrets to finding true love
This belief, that another person can make us happy, is central to the mythology of romantic love. Romantic love, for the most part is simply a composite of sexual attraction. The balance of it tends to be made up of neediness: the need to be wanted, accepted and appreciated. The problem here is that when we do not have our own ‘needs’ met, romantic love quickly fizzles out.

Now don’t get us wrong, we’re all for romantic love and great sex! This modern notion of true love is a result of us being conditioned to find true love to be happy. However, this idea about romantic love is flawed simply because most of us do not understand what true love is all about. True love is changeless and absolute. On the other hand, romantic love can literally blow with the wind. Just look at the terms “falling in love” and “falling out of love.” The implication here is that there is something temporary about love and ‘fall’ becomes the operative word. If we can finally understand and dispel this myth, we would all begin to experience stronger, more loving relationships.

“Falling in love” does not exist because it implies there are varying degrees of love. Love cannot be measured, although most people spend a lifetime in pursuit of it with a measuring stick. Again, love is absolute. Either it is present in your relationships or it isn’t.

Experiencing stronger and truly loving relationships has one requirement: to love yourself. We are not referring to being narcissistic or egotistical here. We are talking about treating yourself in the only way you were intended to be treated: divinely, without conditions, rules or regulations. When you experience self-love you ultimately treat others the same way.

Think about it: if you do not love yourself, how could you truly love another person? You simply cannot give away what you do not have!

What we are suggesting may seem ridiculous, far-fetched and impossible to achieve. To this we respond: you can experience true love for yourself and everyone else in your life when you are open and willing to release and remove all the emotional blocks and barriers to love (which are all fears).

This requires you to go through a process of looking within. Scary at first, perhaps, but rest assured, you will be happy with the end result! We have a 4-step process to get you there. They occur in no particular order, and in fact are more likely to occur simultaneously and ongoing as you begin to unveil the secret to experiencing strong and loving relationships.

These 4 steps are:
1. self-awareness of love or its absence in your life.
2. self-acceptance so you can move to loving unconditionally.
3. self-forgiveness for all that you have done to deny loving yourself and others.
4. self-love: also known as ‘the real deal.’

Follow this process. Stop chasing the carrot. Come alive by experiencing self-love. It’s the only way to truly experience loving relationships, because after all, there is only one real relationship.

Begin to experience real love in your life by downloading your free copy of our Special Report: Breaking The Chain of Emotional Pain – Healing The Emotional Wounds From Your Past.

If you are you ready to improve all of your relationships including the one you have with yourself? Contact us for a complimentary, no obligation coaching session.

©Possibility Coaches, LLC

true love

true love

true love

Your Life Purpose: Acknowledging Your Genius!

Life purpose. I recall several years ago coming across a quote that had a profound effect on me and ultimately changed my life and how I looked at my life purpose. It was written by author Richard Bach who wrote ‘Jonathan Livingston Seagull’ and ‘Illusions.’ It went something like this: ‘Here is a test to find out whether your mission on Earth is complete: if you’re alive, it isn’t!’

Your Life Purpose: Acknowledging Your Genius!
Acknowledging Your Genius!
Everyone’s mission, be it yours or mine, has a purpose behind it. Your mission is very likely to be different than my mission; however, the life purpose behind everyone’s mission is essentially the same. And that life purpose, which is internal, spiritual and universal in nature, is to acknowledge the genius that lives within all of us.

Being a bit of an amateur etymologist (someone who traces the root origin of words), my curiosity was peaked to discover the origins of the word ‘genius.’ In Ancient Roman mythology a genius was a guardian spirit assigned to each person at birth to influence that person’s destiny. Genius comes from the Latin word ‘genere’ which means ‘to produce or create.’

Another interesting form of the Latin root is the word ‘genie’ (of the ‘I’ll grant you three wishes master.’ variety). For some reason Barbara Eden coming out of her bottle just popped into my head!

This all leads me to ask this one question: ‘Were the Ancient Romans on to something when they believed in a spirit guide whose function was to assist each of us to fulfill our life purpose through productivity and creativity?’ I believe they understood at some level, that within each of us, lives a life force capable of assisting you and me to accomplish far more than we could ever imagine!

In our world today, we use the word ‘genius’ quite differently than the Ancient Romans. Genius is a label we attach to certain people. Like all labels, we use them to differentiate between what makes one person superior or inferior to another. Genius on one end of the spectrum. Idiot on the other.

Typically, we think of a genius as ‘above the crowd.’ Someone who has made a great discovery like Edison and the light bulb or Einstein and his Theory of Relativity. Or an artistic genius like Michaelangelo and his Sistine Chapel or David. Or a Mozart, who began composing music at the age of three. Are they really special or superior to you and me? Or was it that they each were completely tuned in to and turned on by the spiritual guardian ‘genius’ that lived within them?

Yes, I know that some people just seem to naturally have talents that appear to be above and beyond what you and I may consider average. However, could the only difference be that Edison, Einstein, Michaelangelo and Mozart simply gave their ‘genius’ the green light to use them as a vessel so their personal missions and destinies could be fulfilled?

No matter how you see yourself right now as you read this article, know this: you have gifts and talents! Perhaps you may or may not be consciously aware of them. You may even deny and turn your back on them as I have done on many occasions. You may also believe that your talents can serve no real life purpose.

Genius resides in all of us. The Ancient Romans knew their stuff (although I am not too keen on what went on in the Coliseum)! The only real difference between someone we call a genius and everyone else is that a genius is someone who has the courage to give him or herself permission to let him or herself shine.

To let yourself shine involves a certain degree of risk. Scary? Perhaps. The payoff, however, can be extremely rewarding.

No matter where you are now in your life’s journey is irrelevant. Time is always on your side. Use it wisely! For all of us the result of our life purpose is to be in some way of service to others. How it looks on the outside is unimportant. Whether it is collecting trash or doing research for curing disease, the result is always to be of assistance in some way to mankind. How your life purpose appears in the physical world can and likely will change many times in your lifetime.

What you are doing now, does not have to be forever; especially if you decide that it is time for a change. Consider giving yourself permission to create a connection with your inner genius! It is with you for your entire lifetime and like the genie in the lamp, it will respond to your requests.
Recall the ancient adage ‘Ask and Ye Shall Receive.’

If you truly desire positive change then begin to acknowledge your genius. It is your life purpose! In this moment, the form it will take in the physical world may very well be a mystery. Be okay with this fact. This is where faith, trust, courage and love play key roles.

On a personal note: Chris and I tap in to our genius by providing a service that assists anyone who is sick and tired of being ‘sick and tired’ and genuinely wants to find solutions to their problems. Yes, Chris and I call ourselves Life and Relationship Coaches; however, the truth is we assist people to first discover their life purpose by acknowledging their genius. Then, together, we begin to dismantle the blocks that have been keeping the genius from coming out to play. Once these block are removed, the genius in you can guide you to complete your mission and fulfill your destiny.

Each genius is quite impressive and extraordinary in nature. Each is unique in how it expresses itself through each of us.

My dream for you is that you simply decide to be courageous and give yourself permission to acknowledge your genius! This is your life purpose. You can no longer say, ‘I don’t know my life purpose!’ The mystery is over! The secret is out! Be open to turning your life over to the genius that is you! God Bless!

Please comment and share!

life purpose

life purpose

life purpose

Jump from the Fiscal Cliff into the Spiritual Pool Now!

Fiscal cliff. I was probably the last person to learn about the latest fear-based sound byte from our politicians and our media. I confess: I have not watched a news broadcast or read a newspaper in nearly 15 years. Why would I? The news hasn’t changed much over the last 50 years except that it receives more air time. From the brief glimpses I’ve seen, ‘yellow journalism’ seems to be rampant.

Jumping from the Fiscal Cliff into the Spiritual Pool
Jumping from the Fiscal Cliff into the Spiritual Pool
The fiscal cliff as a concept is nothing new. You and I, like most people, have been conditioned to believe that life in general is one continuous series of fiscal cliffs. We are conditioned to live in fear, on the edge, looking out into the unknown and expecting the worst to happen. This is how you and I, if we allow it, are controlled by governments, organizations, corporations, religious institutions and by other people in general.

As children, we did not have the ability or know-how to say ‘no’ to being controlled by fear-driven individuals. And that includes our parents! However, as adults, we have the capability to discern truth from falsehood and make choices that are in and for our best interest. Buying into the idea of a fiscal cliff or hanging around the edge of any type of cliff is not in your or my best interest. Would you agree?

I believe as we enter 2013 that we are witnessing a desperate attempt by those who seek power and control through fear, a final push to hang on to old, dated, worthless values, whose time has come to fade away.

Friends, the fiscal cliff for you, for me, for us as a society, is an extreme version of a collective manipulation that can only succeed by making you and I jump of the cliff.

I will now back up and back off for a moment. I believe that I am a person of compassion. I know people are suffering financially and otherwise. I have been there! I know people who are currently suffering through their own personal fiscal cliff. However, although important for survival, financial soundness is not the one and only solution that will eliminate our so-called social problems in the 21st century and beyond.

I propose to you not to buy in to a fiscal cliff or any other precipice where your fear of heights may kick in. I suggest to you that you and I take a different approach to our current and all future hazardous situations by not hanging out on cliff edges.

Instead, may I recommend you consider taking up a more permanent residence in what I call the ‘Spiritual Pool.’

The spiritual pool, like the fiscal cliff, is not a location you will find on any map or world atlas. Your GPS can’t get you there, but your heart and soul can!

The spiritual pool is that place in your vision that emanates from your heart. From this place, your authentic self, which is comprised of unconditional love, peace and compassion, permanently resides in you. It is the best place to be when you are ready and willing to receive solutions to any of your so-called problems, financial or otherwise.

Who you are, where you’ve been and what you’ve done or haven’t done is unimportant to whether or not you relax in the spiritual pool. It is open to everyone. How to get to the pool is up to you. How long it takes you to get there is also up to you.

Some of you may be finding your physical or emotional health on a cliff. You may be confronted with some disease that you feel is causing you to suffer. For others, it may be a marriage or some other significant relationship that is causing you to hang on to the cliff for dear life. And for others, it may be standing on the edge of a cliff because your life at this moment lacks purpose and meaning.

As a Life and Relationship Coach, I deal with people standing on these ‘cliffs’ on a daily basis. Here are a few tips that I learned and have shared that allowed me to enter and bask in the ‘spiritual pool.’ Perhaps they will assist you to turn around, walk away from your own personal fiscal cliff or any other type of cliff for that matter.

Understand that to truly be successful, calm, centered and balanced in all areas of your life requires your willingness to create positive changes. It is the one and only way to get to the Spiritual Pool. Simply follow the old adage ‘If it is to be, it is up to me!’

By the way, these tips are taken from a class that Chris and I have taught live to hundreds of people over the last 5 years and is also available online. This class is called ‘A Blueprint for Success.’ The intent of this class and this article, is that Chris and I share workable ways for you to take responsibility for your life, your happiness and your overall well-being. You can only live this kind of life when you take yourself off the fiscal cliff and jump in to the Spiritual Pool.

Tip #1: Begin to define what a successful life looks like for you. Only you (not the mailman or your manicurist) know what kind of life you want to live.

Tip #2: Take your focus off of you and your so-called problems by being of service to those who are even less fortunate than you. This is the quickest way to get you to the Spiritual Pool.

Tip #3: Be open to healing your relationship with yourself. Since it’s the longest relationship you will have in this lifetime, wouldn’t you rather have it be peaceful, loving and harmonious?

Tip #4: Nurture, treat and feed you body well. You can’t live in the crystal clear water of the Spiritual Pool when you pollute your mind and body with toxic waste and toxic people.

Tip #5: Live life from ‘the inside-out.’ Give yourself permission to heal and grow. Your journey is personal and unique and you will discover it on your own, and in your own way.

Use these tips as your foundation for personal change. Live from the power that is within you. Stop giving your power away to ‘smoke and mirror’ antics like fiscal cliffs and anything else that is initiated for purposes to keep you in fear!

Fear, in all its’ forms, has paralyzed you and me long enough! The time has come for us to realize once and for all that our very survival is dependent upon each of us to take personal responsibility for our own overall well-being.

If you still feel like jumping off the fiscal cliff, that’s your choice. Look closely though, and notice that if you jump in one particular direction you might just land in the Spiritual Pool! Come on in! The water feels great!

Please comment!

To learn more, you’re invited to download a free gift: A Special Report: Breaking the Chain of Emotional Pain -Freeing Yourself from the Negativity of Your Past!

fiscal cliff

fiscal cliff

Stress Free Holiday -Useful Tips

Stress Free Holiday Tips to add more peace, love and joy to your holiday season! Sound good? How do you do it?

Wow, can you believe it!? It’s the holiday season again. So it’s either panic, stress and chaos for you. Or is it the time for love, peace and joy? After all, it is a choice. I will share some tips to assist you to have a stress free holiday filled with peace, love and joy!

How to Have a Stress Free and Peaceful Holiday
Tips for a Stress Free Holiday
Tip #1:
Remember to Breathe!
Yes, you read that right. It’s a matter of remembering to take some deep breaths, or at least, once in a while. Deep breathing is nature’s natural tranquilizer. So if you feel rushed or stressed, take three deeps breaths. Breathe in slowly through your nose for the count of 5 to the point where your lungs are fully expanded. Hold it for 3 seconds. Then release the breath slowly through your mouth for the count of 8. This can be done anywhere at any time. Try it while you are stuck in traffic going to the mall, on line at the grocery store or even when looking at your credit card statement from all your holiday purchases. Deep breathing works wonders and it’s free!

Tip #2:
Give Up the Perfectionism!
Always remember this: people will not remember the ‘things’ that you gave them for the holidays. However, they will always remember the experiences. How do you want to be remembered? Do you want to be remembered for giving the perfect gift, holiday dinner or holiday card even if it meant you are stressed, agitated and overloaded? Or do you want people to remember you for how joyful you made the holidays, or even how joyful you were. Think about that for a minute. What type of holiday legacy traditions do you want to leave? Busyness or peace, love and joy? My neighbor remembers Christmas as being a stressful time of year for her parents. She told me a story about how angry and stressed-out her father was one Christmas and he threw the Christmas tree out the living room window (through the glass). When she recalls the story, it’s as if she was a little girl again. However, my neighbor is 80 years old! For her, she never had a stress free holiday. You can change that for yourself!

Tip #3:
Keep it Simple!
Over the decades, the holiday season has become a time for material things. It’s a big money making time of year. After all, Black Friday now determines the future of our economy. If you don’t believe this is so, recall the news story a few short years ago when a man was trampled to death at a Long island, NY department store when the doors opened early the morning on Black Friday. Two store employees were also critically wounded when they tried to help the man. All in the name of a deeply discounted flat screen TV! I’m not suggesting that we have to be ‘anti-establishment’ or not support the economy. However, I am suggesting that it would be a lot less stressful and less expensive if you kept it simple. For example, a three foot table top Christmas tree can be just as fun for the family to decorate than the twelve foot monster. Remember, it’s all about the experiences! Another example is to purchase gift cards and/or give cash. I know, I know, gift cards have become an outdated way to give a gift, but if done properly, it can be the perfect gift. Cash always makes a great gift too and it’s the only gift I know that isn’t returned or exchanged after the holidays!

When giving a Gift Card, make sure it’s from a place that the person loves to shop. Gift Cards now come in beautiful gift boxes that can be wrapped as a special gift. When you give cash as a gift, make a special presentation of it. For example, if you want to give someone fifty dollars, you can get ten, ten dollar bills. Rolls the bills in a tube shape with a small thin ribbon around each one (similar to a diploma). Then place the rolls of cash in a gift box similar to a box used for jewelry lined in cotton. These simple gift ideas are ways for you to still provide a nice, useful and thoughtful holiday gift without all the stress of running around to department stores or waiting on long lines.

As far as keeping holiday gatherings and dinners simple, here are a couple of tips (especially if time is limited). Cater! Yes, cater! It doesn’t have to be expensive. Many grocery stores now provide fully cooked ham or turkey dinners along with all the side dishes and fixings, and they are reasonably priced. All you have to do it heat it up and serve. Or another idea is to have a ‘pot luck’ or ‘covered dish’ gathering. When given the opportunity, people love to ‘give’ and help out. Guests love to contribute. You provide the place and set the tone for the setting and your guests bring the food. Try it and you’ll never stress-out over a holiday dinner again.

When sending holiday cards, purchase pre-printed cards with your name already printed in the card. All you have to do is write their name inside at the top of the card. Use pre-printed address labels and return address labels. With this approach, you can get 100 cards out in 20 minutes! Again, it’s a matter of giving up the perfection and keeping it simple.

Tip# 4:
Let People Be!
What does that mean? During the holidays, we all tend to be around more people than usual. It seems like all the ‘button pushers’ in your life show up all at the same time! Hint hint, you’ll want to manage your expectations of these people and for gosh sakes, make sure you’re not spending time alone with them! Grumpy Uncle Harry that you only see once a year. Or your daughters’ slug of a boyfriend. Remember, you can’t change people and it’s not your place to change them. Let them be and the holidays will be over before you know it.

One of the most effective ways to make the personality conflicts dissolve during the holiday gatherings is to ‘give up your right to be right’. By that I mean, don’t engage in arguments. Just say ‘Uncle Harry, you’re absolutely right about that. Thanks for pointing that out to me. I never thought of it that way before.’ Trust me, Uncle Harry won’t know what to do with this and it will diffuse an argument before it even gets started. This then may be the first time an unruly, opinionated relative didn’t have anything to say! When in doubt, always remember this: the ones that are the most difficult to love, are the ones that need it the most! Especially during the holidays, adults can seem to act like needy children striving for your love and attention in any way they can get it. Love them anyway! Once you get this, you will have a stress free holiday!

Tip #5:
Take Time for Yourself to Decompress!
The holidays are a time for family, friends and joy. Remember to add a little joy to YOUR day.
Attempt to keep your regular schedule of eating and sleeping as much as possible. Don’t try to get it all done (whatever ‘it’ is.) Understand too that it is okay to say ‘no’. You don’t have to attend every event and do everything. And when needed, ask for help!

Now that the tree is up, the cards are sent, the gifts are wrapped, take time for yourself. Enjoy the experience. Create some balance by giving yourself permission to relax and unwind. Put on your favorite holiday music, make a cup of tea and sit by the tree and enjoy. You deserve it.

You now have five practical tips to make the holidays more peaceful and less stressful, are you going to use them? That’s up to you and it depends on what type of holiday season you want to have? One of perfection and stress or one of peace, love and joy! Enjoy your holidays and create lasting peaceful memories for yourself and those you love.

Written by Chris Pattay. Chris along with his business partner Jon Satin are The Possibility Coaches. For over a decade they have been assisting individuals and business owners worldwide to live a life of meaning, passion and purpose.

To learn more, you’re invited to download a free gift: A Special Report: Breaking The Chain of Emotional Pain: http://www.possibilitycoaches.com

stress free holiday

stress free holiday

stress free holiday

Change Your Story to Change Your Life!

What is your story? What is the story you tell yourself, in your mind, about yourself day in and day out? The story you tell yourself in your mind and tell others, is ultimately how you live your life. If you want to change your life, you have to be willing to change your ‘story.’

Change your story to change your life!
When you carry your negative thoughts and beliefs about yourself and the world (which is your story) from day to day then you can never change your future. You want to learn how to change your story so you can change your life!

So let us explain. There are two types of people in the world: dreamers and dreamers who become achievers.  The world unfortunately labels the first as unsuccessful and the latter as successful. Dreamers talk about big ideas, while achievers put them into action to create a new physical reality. We are all one or the other in any given moment.

Right now, if you are struggling to make positive changes in your life you may be in a dreamer’s mode where you are wishing, hoping and yearning for something better or something bigger. The likelihood is you are living a story you told yourself during your childhood. This story probably includes a lot of reasonable sounding excuses about why it’s hard or even impossible to create different results for your life.

If you are not getting the results you want for your life, then you may not be aware of the type of energy that is the driving force in your life.

If your life feels like drudgery most of the time then it is likely that your story may require some editing and rewrites. Your story may also require a change in its cast of characters. Who are those closest to you? Are they positive, uplifting people or do they drag you down emotionally? It has been said that the results you receive in your life will be determined by who you keep company and spend most of your time with and who you have the closest emotional ties to.

Now, we are not suggesting if your spouse, partner, significant other or other loved ones are not positive role models that you should leave them or eliminate them from your life all together. We are suggesting that you become aware of their unduly negative influence and control, they may have over you. Become open to changing your story so you can begin to change your life and the results you are receiving.

Right now, even in this very moment you may be coming up with some pretty amazing excuses. The fact remains, good stories do not justify a lack of results. You can always come up with truly great reasons to justify unwanted results in your life. The truth is: good stories and negative situations do not equal success, happiness and a reason to get out of bed in the morning.

To change your story and to change your life, requires specific internal shifts on your part that will enable you to change your external results.

To change your life requires:

#1 A willingness to take full responsibility for your life and your life situation. If you are not willing to do this, then nothing will ever change for you. As long as you blame, play the victim and point the finger for all your so-called problems your story will broadcast a series of reruns of your own personal soap opera.

#2 Acceptance of your current life and its’ circumstances. This may seem like it does not make any sense at all. You may be asking, “But if I accept what’s going on in my life, doesn’t that attract more of the same for me: the same results , the same types of people, the same lousy relationships and situations that I am in now?” And we say, “Absolutely not!”

An important explanation is required right here.  You see, there is something called “the paradox of change.” To create change doesn’t mean focusing on getting rid of who and what you don’t want in your life so you can have the people and circumstances that you do want. It means to first accept ‘what is’ in this very moment, be okay that this is it right now.

By doing this you are actually energetically defusing and emotionally detaching yourself from your old story of misery. You are no longer depleting your energy resources that you need to create positive changes. You cease playing the victim day after day to ‘what is’ or ‘what was’ yesterday, last week, last year or a lifetime ago! You now have the energy to move your focus, intentions and action steps into creating positive changes in and for your life.

#3 Knowing your ‘why.’ It is imperative to know your ‘why,’ get a ‘why’ or get a new one. Why do you do what you do? Why do you get out of bed in the morning? Why do you go to work 5 days a week or more? Why do you associate with who you associate with?

If you are unclear about how to answer these questions then you may want to consider uncovering a more powerful ‘why’ for your life. You see, it is a powerful ‘why’ that becomes the driving force behind changing your story to change your life.

When you do not know your ‘why’ or your ‘why’ is something like ‘well, I have to pay the bills, don’t I?’ and have money to go on vacation every summer, then it’s time for a new ‘why’, a new reason for being a bigger, larger than life contributor to the world.  It also means it’s time to stop making money your ‘why.’

When you begin to clarify and create your ‘why’ you are more than likely to run into obstacles that include people, situations, circumstances that really do not want you to change at all. The biggest obstacle may be your belief system about yourself and your world.  If these beliefs are contrary to the results you want, you will feel and perhaps experience your own resistance to positive change.

This is what we classify as the emotional blocks and barriers that prevent you from starring in you life’s story. Learn how to remove the emotional blocks and barriers from your life!

#4 And this is the 4th requirement to change your story and to change your life: releasing and letting go of the emotional blocks and barriers that are causing you to create the same old story day in and day out.

#5 The 5th and final requirement to changing your story is to simply feel the fears that come up during the ‘changing my story’ process, move through them and take the action that is in alignment with the new story, the new results you want for your life.

Understand that changing your story to change your life is a process.  It’s like an education.  In order to enroll in college you must have a high school diploma.  There will be bumps, humps, potholes, trenches, detours and mud on the road; however, it is your willingness, yes, your will, that ultimately is the driving power behind the probability of you changing your life by changing your story.

So, do you want a different story and a different life? Or do you want to continue with the same old, same old? From our perspective, where we are sitting, we suggest you consider changing your story.

Interestingly enough, just by reading this blog, and allowing us to share this information with you, is the beginning for positive changes in your life.

Because we have provided you with wisdom and information, you are now consciously aware that you can change you story to change your life!

To learn more, we invite you to download our free gift: A Special Report: Breaking The Chain of Emotional Pain: http://www.possibilitycoaches.net/pain

change your life

change your life

change your life

Is Your Relationship/Marriage Made in Heaven or a Living Hell?

As a Relationship Coach, I absolutely love counseling couples! Why? Because I enjoy listening to both his and her version of what’s ‘really going on.’ Each one, comes to their sessions believing they know what’s ‘wrong’ with their relationship/marriage. I always sit there with a grin as they each proceed to enlighten me on what their partner is or isn’t doing and saying or not saying, causing a breakdown and ultimate failure of the relationship.

Create Healthy Relationships!
Create Healthy Relationships!
My grins are a response to witnessing ‘the butting of two heads.’ Author and spiritual teacher Eckhart Tolle calls this interaction ‘the meeting of two pain bodies.’ Your pain body, as well as my pain body, is that part of us that believes you and I are separate from everyone else. This pain body also requires other people to fulfill its’ insatiable needs- especially those of the emotional kind.

When we do not have these emotional needs met we are typically faced with large amounts of internal strife. We can label these struggles with a variety of names and conditions. None of them feel good. Some of the names and conditions we give to the other person who is not fulfilling our needs are: ‘selfish,’ ‘self-centered,’ ‘unloving,’ ‘untrustworthy,’ ‘immature,’ ‘manipulative,’ ‘deceitful,’ ‘controlling,’ ‘argumentative’ and ‘critical.’ These are some of the descriptive words my clients, and perhaps you, too, have used to describe your partners both past and present.

As a result of attaching labels and conditions to our partners, we also simultaneously attach descriptive conditions to ourselves. If we do not feel good about ourselves, our self-talk can easily convince us either consciously or unconsciously that somehow we may deserve this current relationship. Your relationship/marriage which you once thought was ‘made in heaven,’ now appears to be ‘a living hell.’

This ‘living hell’ is a direct result of our feelings of unworthiness. This unworthy feeling stems from the belief that we are not deserving to be truly loved for who we are. We may also believe, on some deeper level, that love is not really meant to feel good, so consequently, we push away goodness from our lives. This is particularly true if we were taught not to trust people in general and/or we have experienced people who we thought loved us suddenly depart from our lives either physically or emotionally.

Right now, in this very moment, if you can honestly recognize and assess the status of your most significant relationship, I applaud you! So where do you rate it? Is it a heavenly co-existence, a hellish on-going battle like the ‘hundred years war,’ or somewhere in-between? Does it seem to switch without warning from blissful and loving to rage-filled and chaotic?

Begin now to take notice of the conditions, patterns and behaviors of both you and your partner/spouse that dominate and trend in your relationship. Observe if conflict is more prevalent than peace. Is intimate conversation and communication absent or a painful process that seems to be avoided at all cost?

Be honest about all of this! If you can’t, then honesty is absent from your relationship. I have found that most relationships lack a certain degree of authenticity in that each person wears a variety of ‘personality masks’ to keep themselves from getting hurt by other people.

These masks we wear are associated with the beliefs we have about ourselves, love, and whether or not you and I are deserving of receiving and giving love.

If your relationship/marriage is hellish, don’t get down on yourself or the current situation!

I have found with my own life journey and as a guide to hundreds of others over the years, that our relationships, like every other circumstance we experience, are reflections of how we see ourselves.

Now, this idea has some staggering, perhaps life-altering implications if you even contemplate and consider that this may be true. If all our relationships are simply like a mirror reflecting back to us what we are ‘putting out’ to the world, and we are dissatisfied with what we are experiencing, then perhaps it is time to be pro-active to positively changing the status of our relationships.

I’d like to share with you some basic, yet mandatory requirements that will assist you to begin the process of moving out of hellish relationships toward ones that are more likely made in heaven. These applications can be applied to all of your relationship, however, I am particularly focused here on your most intimate and significant ones at this time.

These ‘requirements’ cannot be overlooked or omitted, for if they are, you will surely experience a continuation of displeasure, disharmony and discord in your relationship or marriage. These requirements are listed below and must be followed in sequential order to create success in your relationship:

1. BEING READY, WILLING AND OPEN. Be ready, willing and open to improve the quality of your relationship. If you are not, then do not proceed! Instead, ask yourself ‘why am I resistant to moving forward?’

2. LOOK WITHIN. Once you agree to the first requirement, be open to looking within. This serves 2 purposes: first, it allows you to get in-touch with your true feelings toward the other person and yourself. It also provides you with greater insight to how you are in some way attracting unloving and unwanted relationships in to your life.

3. TAKE RESPONSIBILITY FOR THE QUALITY OF YOUR RELATIONSHIPS. When you begin to accept that who you attract in to your life is a reflection of who you believe you are, you can begin to take responsibility for all aspects of your life, including your relationships.

4. COMMIT TO CREATING POSITIVE RELATIONSHIPS. Knowing that you are responsible for the status of all your relationships, you can now begin to positively affect their status. To do this requires commitment- and this is huge! This is about becoming the type of person you want in your life. This is acknowledging once and for all that the only person you can effectively change is you!

5. ACCEPT THAT ONLY YOU CAN MAKE YOU HAPPY. By accepting that only you can change your relationships, you are on the road to becoming and doing whatever it takes to make your relationships work. This means that you cease to hold others responsible for your happiness. You also give up trying to change people to meet your emotional needs.

If you are willing to utilize my suggestions, you will gain clarity about yourself and your relationships. You will also see many of your relationships strengthen through love. On the other hand, some relationships may change course or even dissolve, yet they will do so in a more loving way.

This all can be a scary process! However, consider the alternative represented by a lifetime of unhealthy, unpredictable, dysfunctional relationships.

In the end, I guarantee you that the emotional payoff far outweighs the risk you take to create heaven on earth through your relationships!

To learn more, I invite you to download our free gift: Special Report: Breaking The Chain of Emotional Pain:
http://www.possibilitycoaches.net/pain

Are you ready to improve all of your relationships including the one you have with yourself? Contact us or a complimentary, no obligation coaching session.

©Possibility Coaches LLC

marriage

marriage

Begin to Eliminate Worry from Your Life Now!

Have you ever asked yourself, ‘Why do I worry?’ Have you ever asked yourself, ‘What is worry and why does it play such an important role in my life?’

How to Eliminate Worry
How to Eliminate Worry
These questions, in and of themselves, open what I call ‘portals to awareness and change.’ From a life coach perspective, awareness is the first key step to creating any type of positive change in your life. For without conscious awareness, you and I will continue to exhibit thoughts, language and behaviors that either lead us to the promised land of positive results or to the dreaded outcomes and the day of the locusts we so greatly fear.

So, what is worry and why do most of us experience it? All forms of fear, be it anxiety, depression, anger, despair, and worry, serve some purpose. Worry serves the worrier in some purposeful way. When our clients tell me or Chris that they are worried, we always respond with this question, ‘How does worrying serve you?’

You see, each and every emotion we possess and exhibit serves some purpose. Worry, and the experience of worrying and identifying ourselves as a worrier, are simple manifestations of our own energy in motion. The energy that you and I label ‘worry’ never creates a good feeling. Know that all emotions, whether good or bad, create feelings in our bodies. How we feel through our bodies is simply a network of electric charges of sorts. When this charge is fired up over and over again it becomes habitual. This is also known as an addiction.

Which leads me to ask you, ‘Are you addicted to worrying?’ Before you answer that question, know this: most people today are worry addicts. You see, worry, is simply your mind’s fixation and obsession on some future event, situation, experience or condition that has not occurred and may never, ever happen at all. The truth is that nearly all that you and I may worry about never comes to pass. Yet, that fact alone does not stop you from worrying, does it? No, I didn’t think it would!

If your are a worry wart, stop for a moment and ask yourself, ‘Why do I worry so much of the time?’ Listen, and I mean really listen for the answer. I will suggest to you that the response you receive is directly linked to a lack of trust in your own life. Specifically, when it comes to trusting other people, and mostly not trusting yourself.

Worry is always future-oriented. Interestingly, when we are present, mindful of what we are doing here and now, worry vanishes. Though very few of us have mastered living ‘in the now’ all of the time, we are able to eliminate worry when we consciously begin to trust the world, ourselves and the process of life more today than we did yesterday.

Here’s a fact about worry that may assist you to begin to move away from it now: worry is an emotional behavior that is passed on and learned. It is likely that as a child you witnessed one or both of your parents exhibiting worry as a rather constant aspect of their personalities.

My mother, like most mothers, is a habitual worrier. It’s as if she needs something to worry about. It appears that as a society we have conditioned women to believe that motherhood and worrying go hand-in-hand. I believe that a lot of women who play the role of Mom confuse worry for love.

In other words, the belief they live by is ‘if I don’t worry I’m not being a concerned, dedicated, loving parent.’ Within this belief is an inherent lack of trust. That lack of trust is directly (willingly or not) passed on to children. The result is, and has been, a world full of fear-based worriers. Just turn on the news: the advertisers are banking on the fact that you and I are worry addicts!

Loving and caring about others is very different from worrying. There is an old saying ‘the best laid plans of mice and men.’ I forget how it goes. The translation is that no amount of planning can control what the future holds for you and me. We each have a story about how we planned and planned, and worried and worried some more. And in the end none of that really mattered.

With that said, if we cannot control certain outcomes why bother worrying about them at all? And if you can genuinely control an outcome, then take the appropriate action to produce it. In either case it becomes a no-brainer to eliminate worry from your life.

Worry, with its’ habitual nature, can have unfortunate consequences long-term. Some of these consequences manifest in physical diseases like headaches, ulcers and other digestive disorders, to back ailments and cardiac disease, to name a few.

On the non-physical level, worry blocks possibilities and new growth-oriented opportunities from entering our lives. When we focus our undivided attention on what could possibly go wrong, we inevitably miss all the good that is right in front of us, and we miss any future opportunity to improve what currently is our life.

As a recovering worrier, let me assure you that it is very likely you can eliminate worry from your life, too. Here is a simple way to start: grab a pen and a sheet of paper. On this paper write down a list of everything you are currently worrying about…and I mean everything!

Now, put the letter ‘C’ next to each item that you feel you can honestly change or control. These are the situations, experiences or results you fear will happen; however, with right action, you can potentially change or completely eliminate them from ever happening. Next, put the letter ‘U’ along side the items you did not mark with the letter ‘C.’ These represent all the worry items that you believe are uncontrollable and out of your hands and there is absolutely no right action you can take to change or eliminate it from occurring.

When you are done with this exercise, read each item marked with a ‘U’ aloud. Then say: ‘I release this situation, experience, or outcome to the powers that be. I trust the process of life and I know that all is well now and always!’

Then, select one, two or even three items you marked with a ‘C’ that you can potentially change the outcome to create a more desired result. If you can change it, then commit to one action step to do so. The answer may be as simple as you being more trusting and willing to give up the need to worry and control all of the outcomes that life gives you from one day to the next.

Understand that the process of worrying keeps us from feeling good both emotionally and physically. In the long run it can do a ‘real number’ on us in a variety of ways.

Be open to eliminating worry from your life now! Notice when you worry. Ask yourself what function does it serve. How may worry be blocking positivity from entering in to your life? Do the exercise I suggested. Consider doing it on a regular basis until you have taken right action with the future outcomes you can control and change. Over time you will see the list shrink. And finally, feel the worry and be open to turning it over to a higher power, whatever that power is for you.

When worry diminishes in intensity you will witness some astounding changes in your life. You will actually find yourself enjoying life on a deeper, more meaningful level. And that my friends, is what being here and being human is all about!

worry

worry